Sometimes homesickness becomes timesickness, and sometimes it all becomes to much. The only cure for me is poetry
Remember?
Never put the heart into it like you did when you felt at home in childhood, violently ill when there’s a realization: the innocence left long before legs ever spread, before money ever mattered, before parents were just teenagers with crow’s feet:
so god damn homesick it hurts to breath this grown up air.
Remember?
Can’t forget, can’t return, and can’t sit still.
The most important part of being an adult is missing every single aspect of childhood.
I’ll give up the R rated movies that scare the crap out of me, I’ll give up all the sex I’m not having, I’ll give up the alcohol I never drink, I’ll give up the cars I’ve crashed, I’ll give up the makeup I’m chained to, I'll give up the songwriting that keeps the music in the air, I’ll give up the breasts I’m unsatisfied with, I’ll give up the fake smiles that are straight thanks to braces, I’ll give up the bubbly feelings shirtless men give me, I’ll give up the responsibilities I never asked for, I’ll give up the heels I pretend don’t hurt, I’ll give up giving up, I’ll give up the panties that grow more lace to cover less skin, I’ll give up the weed that….I’ll give up the weed, I’ll give up the dyes and torture instruments that makes my hair speak volume, I’ll give up the guilt I feel for road kill I won’t stare at but that I finally see, I’ll give up the razors that leave shallow cuts, I’ll give up the trust to be left alone that leaves me so lonely, I’ll give up never knowing what romantic love is like, I'll give up accepting that all dogs die, I’ll give up being kissed with tongue, I’ll give up ever going to college, I’ll give up art that means something but never looks pretty, I’ll give up run on sentences, I’ll give up having an affair with a teacher, I’ll give up the slap that he deserved, I'll give up the understanding of war that makes soldiers just that much more attractive, I’ll give up the curses that let the anger out, I’ll give up the muffin top that was left behind by my love for muffin tops, I’ll give up knowing that old people really were as dumb as me once upon a time, I’ll give up cheap top ramen for Chef Boyardee, I’ll give up the phone that’s sewn to my hand, I’ll give up literature with substance in exchange for shitty unicorn and wizard books, hell-I’ll even give up PG13 movies because who cares about muttered curse words and some side-boob anyway?
I’ll give up feeling beautiful ever again if someone can just make me young enough to not care how I look.
Enough about me.
Who wants to hitchhike to Neverland?
Who wants to hop trains to the Emerald city?
Who wants to swim to the fountain of youth?
Who wants to dig straight down until we hit Narnia?
Let’s blackmail an elf into taking us to see Santa one last time.
Let’s ask our imaginary friends for advice on staying young.
Let's rub a lamp until a genie sings us a number promising us all of the clock rearranging we want.
Let's take control of our dreams and forget we're sleeping.
Let’s beg the grownups to lie to us again.
Let us forget all the things we’ve learned since we grew up, and let us go back to having nothing to remember.
Remember?
